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Hello, John Horde here again, taking some time off from chronicling the events on the Lord Of The Rings set to bring you the synopsis of the final thrilling instalment in J.R. Tolkein's epic fairy tale.


The final book in the trilogy, "The Return of the King" opens with Gandalf the Wizard arriving at the city of Minast Irith in the fabled realm of Gondar with Poppin, one of the Hobbits. When he arrives there, he is arrested and taken to see mad King Denethor. After interrogating the two, Denethor decides to free Gandalf but he keeps Poppin as his slave.

The vast armies of the evil Sauron besiege the city and the Gondarite soldiers issue forth to battle.
During the battle, news arrives that Denethor's son, Eomer, has been injured. Denethor thinks that Eomer is dead and tries to have his body cremated. Gandalf arrives to try and tell Denethor that his son is alive but Denethor doesn't believe him. They struggle, Denethor falls into the fire prepared for his son and is killed.

On the battlefield, the Gondarite soldiers are being overwhelmed by the Ork armies when reinforcements arrive from the city of Rohan. The orks unleash their secret weapon - an evil dragon. The Dragon kills the King of Rohan but a young girl from Rohan disguises herself as a dead soldier so that she can get close enough to the Dragon to kill it with a magical sword which she borrowed from a Hobbit.

Then a fleet of pirate ships, led by Aragon and crewed by an ghostly army of dead pirates that Aragon met in the caves of the dead, appear on the river next to the battlefield. The pirate army attack the orcs and defeat them.

Aragon marches into the city with his army and proclaims himself King of Gondar and Rohan, which are both now Kingless. He then musters a great army and leads them to Mordar, the castle of the evil Wizard Sauron. Sauron's army meets Aragon's army in a great battle...

The scene then switches back to the two Hobbits, Frodo and his slave Sam. Frodo has been tied up by a giant spider and captured by orks. Luckily, he dropped the magic Ring and Sam picks it up. Using the power of the ring, he makes himself invisible to sneak into the orks' castle, kills all the orks and rescues Frodo. They escape from the ork castle and travel across a desert towards the volcano.

They arrive at the volcano and are about to throw the ring into the lava when Gollum, the giant talking frog arrives and tries to steal the ring. In the fight, Frodo puts the ring on to disappear but Gollum bites his arm off, swallowing the ring. Gollum chokes and falls into the volcano which then explodes.

Sam and Frodo escape with the aid of some friendly eagles who take them to Sauron's castle where they discover that Aragon's army has won the day and Sauron is dead. The hobbits join Aragon's army which marches back to Minast Irith for a big celebration. Aragon's wife, the elfin queen Arwen arrives to bid the hobbits farewell as they depart on the return journey to their homeland of Shire.

When they arrive home in the Hobbit city of Hobbiton, they discover that the hobbit King Lotho has been deposed and killed by the evil Wizard Saraman who managed to escape from the talking trees. The Hobbits form an army and attack Saraman's palace. In the confusion, Saraman's Ork slave, Wormtongue, accidentally kills Saraman and eats him.

The hobbits rebuild the city of Hobbiton and, as a reward for his heroism, Frodo is taken in a golden ship with his mad uncle Bilbo to visit the land of Elves, far across the sea.





Well this book might actually adapt into a satisfying movie. Lots of epic battles to draw in the "Gladiator" crowd, a Dragon to get the role-playing freaks interested and a big explosion when the volcano erupts.

Peter Jackson's playing his cards close to his chest but here's what I'd do if I was in his shoes...
  1. Change the ghost army into an army of zombies to draw the hard-core horror fans.

  2. Play up the romance with the elf-queen Arwen - Tolkein wastes the character but I think PJ should introduce a menage-a-trois with Gandalf possibly. This should spice things up and get some women into the theater.

  3. Expand the role of the Dragon - it could easily escape into the city and "up" the damage quotient - this will make the movie interesting to your average Japanese film-goer who will otherwise not bother to see the movie.

  4. Get Sir Sean Connery to provide the voice of the dragon.

  5. Make sure that all the villains are English, otherwise no Hollywood studio worth it's salt will want to touch it. Perhaps consider changing the name "Mordar" to "England" and "Sauron" to "King Sauron IV". Maybe enquire whether Dick Van Dyke is available to provide voices for Orks? (Along with the inclusion of Connery, this will guarantee that the whole population of Scotland will go to see the movie at least twice).

  6. The frog character, Gollum, isn't nearly menacing enough. Change him into a baby dragon (think 'velociraptor') or something similar.


So, this book has actually got something going for it. Perhaps Peter Jackson should consider just adapting this on its own. If it is a success, then the other two 'prequels' could be produced - the fans will already be there and it wouldn't matter that the first two books are rather lackluster.

John Horde


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